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发表于 2008-5-26 03:12:22
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We always hear "the rules"+ U3 c$ h: i" ^1 C1 W1 G
From the female side.7 o8 ?# y C! o6 a, f
Now here are the rules from the male side.
* ^! f( ~* D' n% eThese are our rules!9 ^1 ~ \& h: X! U# n e6 s
Please note.. these are all numbered "1"
7 e; V; m3 `0 L8 k4 {8 n) }1 c, LON PURPOSE!
2 ]" o1 ~4 D' H: F3 c' s: Q7 t1. Men ARE not mind readers.
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2 ?1 N( p4 I. x+ f1. Learn to work the toilet seat.% W1 l. g: h, B- X
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
: `; |* D8 g: [5 L7 x9 FWe need it up, you need it down.
) n" S2 l1 T' P- I/ l5 rYou don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
4 {8 C ]( N6 r* F4 r, jor the changing of the tides.1 E3 t0 {1 e5 h
Let it be.& U0 C# ^7 C: e, J
* X. U0 D0 Z0 H1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
. O1 R. H& z% z: E T$ I1 W7 Q- H+ AAnd no, we are never going to think of it that way.
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1 i2 K* z$ G' f; J$ H$ p$ j4 r1. Crying is blackmail.
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- s2 s0 A2 J' V* ]1. Ask for what you want.* [ C8 ~% M$ A8 }8 \$ F
Let us be clear on this one:, _% x2 u1 q9 ^# ]
Subtle hints do not work!+ l% T1 G3 ~ N* p; W
Strong hints do not work!
) l2 G8 p2 b, M3 L' dObvious hints do not work!
$ O% e# _: T$ N Z# HJust say it!4 v) J) t- S" r3 I
. m/ l6 H5 F* r) L0 x4 n; H9 R1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question.
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's what we do.
2 A, J1 D0 {: i+ @" ~Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
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: X8 |6 @& `9 x/ f/ Z( {# x1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.' O1 d( T* s( B) d3 W
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
8 {$ p8 E( A! L \In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
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' d5 H* I; m2 U+ M) G5 r1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.
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+ D: x( R( d2 {9 q4 v1 N# I0 ]6 y1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.6 L) p1 `$ x% _
Don't ask us.
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one ..1 b) e+ F, B& g" V
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1. You can either ask us to do something! {1 c# A4 }: j V$ C
Or tell us how you want it done.$ E5 ]9 Q, a. }$ X- d% q. K
Not both.
& D5 F J( v5 j4 s" {4 jIf you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
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9 }0 ?% ^/ Z; S+ N1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.9 H3 x* Q; B% p8 f$ L. x. ]
* V; |/ [5 b; J* Z1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.$ R" q# f& y: r4 B2 B& y
7 y+ D0 G2 j; a3 I. T: g1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.7 y6 k$ R! _0 c+ w( k' F
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not! A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
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% B) X& @ N8 M6 o# _' e. j1. If it itches, it will Be scratched.
2 l$ @2 z2 o5 ^. @7 nWe do that." O& p/ r3 e i. ~- I; A( H
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.9 N* w7 U: h5 V$ d
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.8 e$ [+ i) D; H" F& X2 r
' l, y6 |/ g/ W& M0 C1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
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# X- Y$ j8 w8 K5 V1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is fine...Really.
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4 a+ F- s5 Z' C" y! H( ?+ e7 k# ~1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
- h6 o; ~ U, o- @6 s( Zor golf.
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5 k5 X( S% o3 L7 r; j1 Q1. You have enough clothes.
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( T6 e; g# f1 u5 P# Q4 q b. r; W1. You have too many shoes.
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!) O0 j* y; E' J
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1. Thank you for reading this.
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+ f" ^/ q& x8 _. K4 i/ A) q7 QBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping. |
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