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发表于 2008-5-26 03:12:22
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We always hear "the rules"
3 v' {$ F) R, PFrom the female side.
' b; `8 p1 B R. [1 h& p4 r0 FNow here are the rules from the male side.! Z q6 z. O$ _# [0 @
These are our rules!
6 Y( Y2 P9 F! VPlease note.. these are all numbered "1"6 N, z1 V A5 j/ v
ON PURPOSE!
# p$ r, w7 X; o/ N3 M1. Men ARE not mind readers.
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat.3 q+ t8 [& m: I
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
) _7 C" \* q# c( lWe need it up, you need it down.
% k. S u& R: ~: M5 NYou don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
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! p+ m* b7 U8 w. D' ` j E1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon; z/ x" A' b; L
or the changing of the tides.
9 U% s6 A- `( q2 f$ d4 vLet it be.) Z5 r$ u7 b) n B- S
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
" n0 c* ~+ A- C5 U% j" C: RAnd no, we are never going to think of it that way.
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1. Crying is blackmail.
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/ } i3 j$ _2 {/ Z2 Z6 I1. Ask for what you want.
, p0 _! n4 r# \Let us be clear on this one:! [+ ] e" B. k/ ]3 p
Subtle hints do not work!
2 t# Q% [$ P+ U( uStrong hints do not work!
( u- F% K! W5 dObvious hints do not work!
# H+ V4 c! U( S) S1 I' e" VJust say it!- @8 R6 U/ t+ \5 P" G
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question.' s# `( V0 d" v$ G7 S9 N
6 w2 d9 j- S; o( ^# E: c% u1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's what we do.
9 t& _ a2 {7 O% w8 ZSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
; i5 r3 M- r( eIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.6 J: T4 Y5 e2 S" l- Y) i' k9 x
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.7 w4 q: w# C& ~$ X% b: f5 G: ?5 k- W3 ~
Don't ask us.- L( E! K* d% N& }( ?% s
6 q5 A4 v2 n+ b0 }+ N1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one ..
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3 C2 ~4 g" L2 M1. You can either ask us to do something0 k y" G. U: X% n
Or tell us how you want it done." ~' @, D" b) P% i+ B( H
Not both.6 R* O x* h `+ k9 t
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
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' ^' w1 M; S/ _# J- N5 `1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
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P4 w# F' @5 N1 q; h/ @5 U1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
3 h1 x2 L8 A4 v5 lPeach, for example, is a fruit, not! A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
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- V8 ?' u1 y8 T+ @# L6 t0 ]1. If it itches, it will Be scratched.
; R% p: o7 Q" l2 z* f. m; wWe do that.
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.$ X e& A7 A1 [( f. H# P
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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* A8 M6 {/ ~9 D! G# |1 j1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
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7 t3 k' R4 w F4 q# J1 Y1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is fine...Really.
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
- A3 U4 R9 k7 h/ \" eor golf.
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. `# H$ y, N; n8 P1. You have enough clothes.9 e) l Q- ?) U, ?7 N9 i6 b
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1. You have too many shoes.5 s+ b$ k' [4 ]
. _" c) r5 [# U8 A1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!! H# d) q) b: T
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1. Thank you for reading this.
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But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping. |
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