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发表于 2008-5-26 03:12:22
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We always hear "the rules"; Z5 o! F( d8 g* o+ J$ v
From the female side.
& x" k- O! s( GNow here are the rules from the male side.
5 L9 v1 z% m- i$ }9 |These are our rules!4 g) Q0 H" |" Z2 K g
Please note.. these are all numbered "1"
5 [1 P7 w# R- T2 s) a9 v4 lON PURPOSE!
/ C+ M5 u7 j5 p% ~* r8 m1. Men ARE not mind readers.
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2 Q* X+ T/ F5 [% w1. Learn to work the toilet seat.! D' i/ @" R' L m/ ^1 l+ F8 S
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.8 V4 i1 k n2 F3 @1 ] ]) u: m3 `
We need it up, you need it down./ D/ ] L" {& c, p. w
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
. f! \) \! X$ }1 _$ a: i/ V3 dor the changing of the tides.' _4 {0 p9 N# ^# m8 A& N
Let it be. w5 E, g. q+ m, E
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport.) F0 w [) Y+ |9 F5 B5 _2 _
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.2 D) m! Y% r( F6 v6 L9 k9 e( p" @
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1. Crying is blackmail.
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1. Ask for what you want.5 |9 E* R* K) G- h0 y5 d3 ]
Let us be clear on this one:
0 b" Y+ t9 B/ PSubtle hints do not work!
W, H5 N$ u' ?/ B2 SStrong hints do not work!% a, |0 s8 [" f
Obvious hints do not work!4 r" I3 o: W2 b
Just say it!
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9 P5 `- v$ R& Z. F& O1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question.
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* p+ l: ]+ x, s6 R* ?4 G1 x1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's what we do.
" Q# I4 O! Y, o8 H: fSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
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! ]5 r* |; i4 ~4 F1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument., [2 z0 y1 Z8 b7 j' u
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.# i5 a3 W& L+ v$ W! m4 b
& @8 x( T- h4 M# }+ R) I1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.% e# b8 y0 e% \/ E
6 a9 g2 v4 _: ?1 v1 {* i- Q1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.7 \, _! F* H* Y9 m0 y* ]
Don't ask us.: E& ~' Y( b/ ]3 Y
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one ..2 |1 i( g3 m6 Q; ?/ C& B" C. \ E
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1. You can either ask us to do something
0 ~7 G3 d% t; T2 ?2 `2 |Or tell us how you want it done.( p4 i3 E% z% c$ @
Not both.
$ m, P& r1 Y Z2 QIf you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.2 s9 N1 g: J, U8 r+ e
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
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- f& m' X* z6 d2 p e( Y+ L/ n1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.6 g" q E" [& ^: t9 {, B
6 J9 g) ?8 E) h. Q; B1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
5 o& Q& z! ]& O* u( KPeach, for example, is a fruit, not! A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. K$ |1 o$ F" q$ q
We do that.5 F8 K4 a, @) q2 }) ^
$ U4 p$ @5 ?1 M1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
! l# e$ z3 i/ F! [( @We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.) L& [8 s# D ^/ H8 e4 R% U
/ n/ e8 u/ H6 d3 _1 y# a1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.3 J% t2 F8 x1 ]) Z
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is fine...Really.9 V9 ~% ?" Q. J) e | K- z
$ C6 B; o3 x/ X/ t4 J8 S7 F/ W1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
1 P2 U- K# S& U: E0 [or golf.
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1. You have enough clothes.
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/ J# I! H1 \ w$ \# J8 [0 ^: |: e1. You have too many shoes.3 ]$ }5 W# ^* }& z% V5 w
: t! J2 t$ g- ^1 M1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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1. Thank you for reading this.
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+ v5 x$ ]2 a1 Q1 qBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping. |
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