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"What do you want in a Man?" or "What do you want in a girl?" is often the question to the boy or girl who is seeking for his/her partner.When you are young your standards are set very high, however, as you age, you will have to lower your standards a bit and a bit and a bit.... The following joke is absolutely hilarious yet brutally true.- H) G g' ^2 H* o6 ^) F: Q
"你理想的男友是什么样的"或"你理想的女友是什么样的"是大多数男孩或女孩在寻找伴侣的时候提出的问题。当你还年轻的时候标准定的相当高,但是随着年纪的增长,不得不一点一点的降低你的标准。下面的这个笑话虽然幽默但非常真实。$ ^% w8 R2 x4 |" k* _3 e
/ V# d7 ?" X" Y+ o Age 22 - 22岁时! B* ~1 H5 y. B+ q8 v/ m' t
What I Want in a Man - Original List
Q1 f; t# H9 N* q 1.Handsome7 y! g" o8 T+ y' o
2. Charming! ^, L' v: I. i, O
3. Financially successful
# a! x& W, Y$ Z! A2 } 4. A caring listener
% N e; L m& ^4 O+ c 5. Witty
! g j5 _7 I4 y- ~" H 6. In good shape
* s4 a6 l9 Z# C, t. U5 d 7. Dresses with style
* n2 X0 z4 {$ [& w 8. Appreciates finer things
" ~) |+ [/ a! d9 s 9. Full of thoughtful surprises5 t+ ?' U1 }/ N& P, E
10. An imaginative, romantic lover.8 c1 j! p' K/ m+ R. u
3 j8 ] \( q. L
我理想的男友标准 - 原版
3 @$ l* ~! {# K! B" K) G 1. 英俊
, b2 P( u; o2 Z. c: [. L 2.有魅力
8 Y1 S+ P& J+ ?0 ^7 q0 q 3.有经济实力6 \3 u5 j: ]* v* ^" V+ F5 }
4.善于倾听. P$ |$ n3 G2 e9 n0 V( f
5.机智
- i7 q9 [' ^7 _1 T2 Q 6.良好的外形
; N1 H u9 \& ]* V0 B 7.衣着有品味+ C* m' s, D7 Z/ ~; W x
8.欣赏美好事物9 v$ R5 d2 \* u! G7 H* P
9.充满惊喜
4 b$ g& L6 j! s; }, {: }, ` 10.富有想象力的浪漫情人" o5 D3 ^+ p8 X; J) M# H) i# j
; ~3 \/ @8 i( H: a- _0 [' A Age 32 - 32岁时
) u# V) A1 i+ f* e) ^* e3 U+ U7 w What I Want in a Man - Revised List3 k& l! z) x: H% R$ z# \
1. Nice looking (prefer hair on his head)( [! z" Z1 Y# V/ D5 s# L
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs: u9 n( u# e% E" m3 { Y
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner# L9 ~$ y5 e; Q5 ^9 s1 v
4. Listens more than talks) Z* G. S; p" g8 d) ~/ o" q
5. Laughs at my jokes
0 R/ p8 w k1 j. F3 @ 6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
6 K% l, E+ k6 N9 x# Z$ X 7. Owns at least one tie
+ t/ c4 z' P: T+ h" P 8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal9 I# X2 j6 I+ M0 e
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries. s1 U7 J8 F8 t+ B5 U( n6 P; h0 w* \
10. Seeks romance at least once a week. . k9 ]# [* r9 }9 n# ^
/ z7 l/ n4 L; w& a 我理想的男友标准 - 修订版
) g, S0 p" w, N 1.五官端正(有头发者优先)+ I6 A' j" U9 O
2.上车帮我开车门,入座帮我拉椅子
4 q; s1 u9 U$ E$ w 3.有足够的钱享用美妙的晚餐
, c" x* l; y7 ~& Q; a 4.少说多听
% d* O" z2 z2 E D% o/ _( P 5.我说笑话的时候一定要大笑
& R" z- x, y* K* ^& I 6.逛街的时候帮我拎包9 e6 i- Q; O6 E7 ^5 ~7 _0 J
7.至少有一条领带/ H- Y+ }7 D! D% n2 E1 x! w
8.喜欢家里烹饪的晚餐$ {: l# C' n h
9.记得我的生日和各个纪念日
1 U w0 J1 O& D( A 10.一周至少制造一次浪漫约会
) e0 N0 L5 K b, w5 m4 c0 L7 L5 ~; `
Age 42 - 42岁时
, _6 h( }4 c o( _* Q1 ?/ D What I Want in a Man - Revised List
/ ^' ]: J7 w. |5 ~# ~ 1. Not too ugly (bald head OK)& _5 V* `9 |# C/ d+ I3 U
2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car: q* W2 w# x: }3 V% @
3. Works steady -- splurges on dinner out occasionally
! a& w' [7 _9 Y" Y3 ^ 4. Nods head when I'm talking- i) u) H, A, w/ Y, u$ |- b
5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes9 H# [6 T5 N! o6 F. Y1 R) d8 W u: K
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture/ P- T) e; E, o7 B- V
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
* H( [# J8 d5 A: {$ N; v 8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
- x6 G$ D& `% o8 ?! v9 G 9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down; q8 @$ X; l6 A( d* p
10. Shaves most weekends." l7 K( R, I* U! f
/ R" W6 U0 [. R8 N) Q6 s
我理想的男友标准 - 修订版
9 D7 s( e5 s( P/ s5 H 1.不太丑(谢顶也可)
& _) h. G/ b( B 2.我上车后才开车& A( U$ K% S7 x/ }8 j
3.工作稳定-偶尔外出吃饭
! l C6 s l6 e6 q' c5 y 4.我说话的时候点头
0 q& E+ X3 Y! O B5 Z2 F 5.通常记得笑话中的妙语
& v6 @9 m3 [8 O5 s- I+ u# K2 e+ G 6.有足够的力气搬家具
8 x" G6 }1 x: k7 i 7.没有啤酒肚* @6 G- [+ _" b, ~. R- f; o
8.不买带螺旋盖的香槟+ O7 @7 h% J1 E" w/ P3 e5 P' B7 q8 y% V
9.记得放下马桶座圈
; S1 |- y# \% n8 E: b& }% R( i 10.大多数周末会刮胡子5 [5 A/ U- V+ @) x( A; z0 f# {4 N
$ p) g- {8 b1 e" B& C! N" G/ h% o' @ Age 52 - 52岁时
. a/ p- p: g* L( _: V9 p What I Want in a Man - Revised List' {! V3 U6 A$ T3 h# Q
1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed
; Y/ z: [$ t7 b! o1 `3 E3 g 2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public4 J5 _8 f2 W" M) G
3. Doesn't borrow money too often) u8 G- U6 A6 R
4. Doesn't nod off to sleep when I'm venting
6 S7 g3 w2 E$ J7 Y9 U7 X 5. Doesn't re-tell the same joke too many times! X# l5 q4 {% i& y# {6 H
6. Is in good enough shape to get off couch on weekends* ^; [: X4 A+ u+ \% ^, D
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear3 q$ e @2 \5 y* _
8. Appreciates a good TV dinner
( D* E+ n, b7 S, w 9. Remembers my name on occasion
+ g1 F* P& f- h, { 10. Shaves some weekends.9 [* q3 Z: B- b T
. ]6 y7 s# S5 t$ A& h7 }) M* j 我理想的男友标准 - 修订版; P# j+ \6 d) n* `: n
1.保持鼻子和耳朵处的毛发整洁
& ^; m9 f: @! s7 u/ H& }1 b 2.不在公共场合打嗝或搔痒# {2 \, y8 }; e' s! f7 P: G( W
3.向别人借钱不要太频繁
9 i% T p6 o, W+ M3 |5 V5 L' b8 F- A 4.当我生气的时候不许打盹睡着
. T, I( T- ^) k# R, e 5.不要多次重复讲同一个笑话% u0 F* C0 G& D4 m* S. N
6.周末不要一直赖在床上9 D- X, n2 i4 |$ o0 @
7.常换内衣裤,袜子要成对
# [8 h; [; z4 Y8 P3 ?0 X5 d% N" M 8.欣赏电视晚餐
5 t6 q F+ v S& |8 P" V3 b 9.必要时记得我的名字
0 P# M" M2 e2 Q n; O( Z 10.有时周末会刮胡子' V1 x( O) K: l. O
- ^/ q$ K2 C+ O; J4 J Age 62 - 62岁时
% G# W o8 O/ x# u* }( \ What I Want in a Man-Revised List# b1 [5 d1 g! |) n: n6 e; X1 V: P
1. Doesn't scare small children1 w7 o' T# p/ L& {( F$ \
2. Remembers where bathroom is$ `, }$ Q7 P' b! l4 S0 g4 [- t9 ]
3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep0 y1 P7 M8 C7 u$ [% ^# q$ `7 w
4. Only snores lightly when asleep- \. c. S- z0 O+ n
5. Remembers why he's laughing0 t$ r; `, b3 P7 o
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
+ H c. T. V; ~3 Q 7. Usually wears clothes
- E+ ^4 ]" W! A 8. Likes soft foods
0 ?- N0 `, b. d/ \ W3 w5 e- M' D. D 9. Remembers where he left his teeth
+ r0 h) U$ F% m% ~) Z 10. Remembers that it's the weekend.
5 q9 e7 s1 s' h& f9 p( o
) [4 N7 A6 M+ Q( D7 w" g5 { 我理想的男友标准-修订版
$ @2 L7 h8 X3 _3 I1 Z 1.不要吓唬小孩子' @- v/ ]; M" r- C8 p
2.记得浴室在哪3 ^! `/ ^$ {/ k5 p% Q* y
3.不需要太多钱生活
/ o0 P/ I. f1 Z8 s- i 4.睡着的时候鼾声较小$ [- J7 r; F: w! f$ n0 t2 l
5.记得自己为何大笑
; r3 J7 }' R9 P3 g. [+ \: N& s0 d* Y 6. 行动自如
' Y9 j- f7 ?0 W: k+ I 7.通常穿着衣服& }8 V# |- j* Z- M4 ~( m6 H& b
8.喜欢软的食物% S; l0 s9 E, |5 J
9.记得把自己的假牙放哪了' N& m" e5 u5 F- F$ S
10.记得哪天是周末* X0 S5 y8 m- q% U
( [% V) E' G& w' u3 A Age 72 - 72岁时% T* ~% _; ~$ Z `5 ~! r
What I Want in a Man-Revised List. H) Y9 \/ |4 R
1. Breathing4 v' X/ u5 n2 V2 \: Q
2. Doesn't miss the toilet y6 K: N6 j% v; m: `- B# W
9 B$ A9 |9 p$ ?; z8 Z
我理想的男友标准-修订版: t7 }6 O/ |! n: [' p
1.活的
8 m6 j5 f. P8 J$ T% g 2.能找到卫生间 |
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