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"What do you want in a Man?" or "What do you want in a girl?" is often the question to the boy or girl who is seeking for his/her partner.When you are young your standards are set very high, however, as you age, you will have to lower your standards a bit and a bit and a bit.... The following joke is absolutely hilarious yet brutally true.
+ Y0 r0 r$ \; u) I "你理想的男友是什么样的"或"你理想的女友是什么样的"是大多数男孩或女孩在寻找伴侣的时候提出的问题。当你还年轻的时候标准定的相当高,但是随着年纪的增长,不得不一点一点的降低你的标准。下面的这个笑话虽然幽默但非常真实。. e; g& g0 _! R$ f6 A. q7 B# I' q
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Age 22 - 22岁时
6 G+ n; L4 c' w+ M What I Want in a Man - Original List
: W& X* b! G! f 1.Handsome; l4 X* ^' B" x1 I1 |* u `
2. Charming
4 Z- ~: A ?7 R" I5 P. @* R 3. Financially successful
, f, y+ Z7 g4 t8 _6 R' I4 G 4. A caring listener0 T4 r1 P; T- l2 s2 D
5. Witty
: S- R5 ]/ c y5 d( I7 e 6. In good shape
8 K/ o3 ~! s: w9 H0 n 7. Dresses with style7 Y) Z7 ^, M& g: `1 f1 O& f" k
8. Appreciates finer things
3 V0 D; T( L/ ~ `* A% | 9. Full of thoughtful surprises
0 S) Z% r8 x: P) v( l 10. An imaginative, romantic lover.3 M4 `1 Q0 B/ q; s
1 r. ^) K/ @. b: O0 ~& b& W 我理想的男友标准 - 原版* F7 Y+ ~' U: E. {9 |4 o/ ]; l
1. 英俊
$ w2 m# N( c' ^2 [ 2.有魅力
. d! t: N) S" n' b$ z& h 3.有经济实力( X3 b3 @ j3 J! w8 Z( v" o
4.善于倾听$ |( v' x9 H$ K1 q* \3 k( f. H- l
5.机智' @( Z3 o6 l: X+ T
6.良好的外形/ ~$ F, v4 s, u' Z$ P8 q: f
7.衣着有品味# a7 _* [* N. `5 A, [
8.欣赏美好事物& h+ _4 C& v; K
9.充满惊喜3 E; L& e4 c$ R) C
10.富有想象力的浪漫情人
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Age 32 - 32岁时, M: `* I" C9 l& U% U8 ]3 i
What I Want in a Man - Revised List9 `; F( ~0 g; Q2 W4 [2 c& [
1. Nice looking (prefer hair on his head)
# I* R0 R+ N5 |& Y9 P+ t 2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
% y) l" @# B, \ t) A1 K7 [7 V 3. Has enough money for a nice dinner2 O2 [* s8 n4 v0 {7 O' ]" ^& x
4. Listens more than talks
) Z. a' | G. ]: e: J% v 5. Laughs at my jokes
9 H$ E$ x* t: M; C; l 6. Carries bags of groceries with ease8 k+ {" m: g* D/ c
7. Owns at least one tie9 N2 K9 A5 l! w+ D
8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal! b0 t' q' q. L! G0 b- K: n i4 a
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries
/ H9 k/ z7 @8 E8 P5 ^ 10. Seeks romance at least once a week.
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7 q9 V% X$ h1 @ I1 G) f4 v) W8 f 我理想的男友标准 - 修订版
$ w ^* q5 n% h7 y% F* v 1.五官端正(有头发者优先)
3 K2 c( M" F3 \7 p1 | Q 2.上车帮我开车门,入座帮我拉椅子( r+ I" z1 ?0 U
3.有足够的钱享用美妙的晚餐
1 _1 C; s7 E5 s# }0 T1 P8 ?# | 4.少说多听
# {, I- d8 C+ M 5.我说笑话的时候一定要大笑: D: Z/ r, q; |2 D( m
6.逛街的时候帮我拎包
) m! _5 v1 X$ Y! t \ 7.至少有一条领带( z! }# I" S3 \! q5 Q/ U4 E' M0 |
8.喜欢家里烹饪的晚餐$ E8 l% {! m+ P8 K+ q# M+ H
9.记得我的生日和各个纪念日: O& }3 W( x% O) V
10.一周至少制造一次浪漫约会
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Age 42 - 42岁时 v c& D9 ]" ]3 C0 R/ C
What I Want in a Man - Revised List3 V @: S% a( J) Z; @: u$ X4 L
1. Not too ugly (bald head OK)
# F: u- w9 J4 z" J5 k$ `, j# J# O 2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car
; b: \ q1 J" S' p, g. O }7 W9 G 3. Works steady -- splurges on dinner out occasionally
d# K' ]) [) S9 J p1 _4 [ 4. Nods head when I'm talking: X; t" U' F7 [( \/ q
5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes9 j# N! w& N+ I. e2 d: b- m0 r
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture- p! z. M! X" f
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
. E# H- j8 i$ O9 e( j# U* a6 t 8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids4 _/ v" O4 M F) X/ P" C/ k
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down
$ s- v- i+ {5 f! V) y, C6 ? 10. Shaves most weekends.
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我理想的男友标准 - 修订版5 a: K/ |% ^* p0 m, {# l, r2 _
1.不太丑(谢顶也可)
; B0 t& H- X/ h* ?7 Q 2.我上车后才开车
3 F* L ~& ~# t" A( _) z/ ^ 3.工作稳定-偶尔外出吃饭
5 s) r. i5 [2 v+ e 4.我说话的时候点头
1 d5 A0 y S! w$ H7 _ 5.通常记得笑话中的妙语6 F& L+ Q0 d9 ^' u5 k
6.有足够的力气搬家具
0 F1 ^9 w5 w: O 7.没有啤酒肚
' Z5 K+ w/ H# e! s' D9 T- n5 b+ j 8.不买带螺旋盖的香槟
2 l7 b) S: r0 M: F! N 9.记得放下马桶座圈
- ^1 w5 p' h3 j4 y' Z# D0 \ 10.大多数周末会刮胡子0 {2 T; Z5 b& n+ F6 J! q+ }
) B( F3 B5 w z1 [ Age 52 - 52岁时
$ V- Z& E: ^; Z) k% `! X0 D7 J6 ~ What I Want in a Man - Revised List( K' d( [4 r- `/ t4 _0 }
1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed4 K* c) L/ A4 c7 G% y3 s/ ~" b. k
2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public5 h/ S2 `$ u) c- y! I* p
3. Doesn't borrow money too often9 o( `% Q" {: Y4 {# \
4. Doesn't nod off to sleep when I'm venting
, H, q" V3 e( A! Q( y# J 5. Doesn't re-tell the same joke too many times
. M& k' t& k5 |. e$ X2 s 6. Is in good enough shape to get off couch on weekends
2 v0 i3 u/ g8 q) e, s8 g 7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear# _4 q+ G& y; `2 i! b" z
8. Appreciates a good TV dinner
6 i5 z9 e( R: A2 U. ` 9. Remembers my name on occasion
+ T0 B' ]! L4 X K* V2 H 10. Shaves some weekends.; P h# H) X1 X( o' l; l
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我理想的男友标准 - 修订版
) C. q6 `, u; p) D6 T% z( p9 s, F4 U 1.保持鼻子和耳朵处的毛发整洁$ \* M$ z8 j7 H. ]7 o) o
2.不在公共场合打嗝或搔痒% x# F+ K1 j( ^9 U
3.向别人借钱不要太频繁
; Y0 A s6 }$ s" `7 s 4.当我生气的时候不许打盹睡着
! z# m! {0 r+ i. s3 x8 ? 5.不要多次重复讲同一个笑话2 Z( T& p" l5 c3 P
6.周末不要一直赖在床上+ A9 |. e8 A6 m) v! E# b7 }, z
7.常换内衣裤,袜子要成对/ H9 |; [. v1 A, B
8.欣赏电视晚餐# Y8 q8 ^% `4 L) b0 G
9.必要时记得我的名字
; L8 y/ l+ U/ v" n: ~ 10.有时周末会刮胡子
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Age 62 - 62岁时
1 S; h3 u& U z What I Want in a Man-Revised List
5 P& R L9 u$ H% ?5 D7 v 1. Doesn't scare small children
( c H' q; n4 G1 a$ z. W 2. Remembers where bathroom is
+ b9 [$ A/ ^. R* K. z% x3 E, A 3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep% r' j# Q/ n8 ~
4. Only snores lightly when asleep
' J# y! e, ~! @8 U7 h: R 5. Remembers why he's laughing) n" J& w( b( H; [; J, h1 X! {
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself3 v. L( V! S& \! B- l
7. Usually wears clothes5 ]# _+ u; V, U
8. Likes soft foods
1 X* @/ i- D1 H7 A0 D 9. Remembers where he left his teeth
$ G9 [3 A8 E7 P" N1 V/ o" O" g* ?7 T( d 10. Remembers that it's the weekend.
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我理想的男友标准-修订版% C6 L9 y# }- |& h# t
1.不要吓唬小孩子
/ J- C0 J% b" Q+ @ 2.记得浴室在哪
/ e! C; `# U3 Y5 g N' w 3.不需要太多钱生活
0 ]! a; F/ t2 P5 ]2 Y7 c 4.睡着的时候鼾声较小
: V, r# {+ P# ?9 B) C0 I 5.记得自己为何大笑/ ~7 H# ?: Z0 \) m
6. 行动自如
$ u# V0 N+ I: f' s/ @9 [0 K) ]5 a 7.通常穿着衣服
( T) [! E2 H9 L; \, S: I 8.喜欢软的食物 w0 _ ~" |5 [! R6 N. g
9.记得把自己的假牙放哪了8 h$ p8 d9 M3 Q6 }4 m- m
10.记得哪天是周末0 @- f: }' E! u; r3 _
: N1 L* V" V* m2 n x# i Age 72 - 72岁时
% Z# p X# L- Z What I Want in a Man-Revised List
5 ?# t2 g$ q5 ?' } 1. Breathing
( T' y2 B/ k: ~) p% J 2. Doesn't miss the toilet4 l5 [* g6 y4 s0 e& O9 }5 a5 \1 M
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我理想的男友标准-修订版
* U3 |9 L H$ h! f 1.活的( p. E: G q3 }7 G- e
2.能找到卫生间 |
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